I'm Not Over You
by LostFan4life
Summary: Rewritten. Sometimes love just isn't enough to make it work, but sometimes it is and sometimes it happens in the most unexpected ways. Can they make it work the second time around and prove that love can conquer all? Jate/Skate
1. Chapter 1

They were never on the same page. Lately all they seemed to do was fight. Most of the time it started of something small and then turned into a screaming match, and before they knew it they were sleeping in separate bedrooms. Jack stayed at work as long as he could, pouring himself into work to avoid the fights. He would come home late and excuse himself to bed, neither of them say more than a few words to each other. How had it ended up like this? They used to be crazy in love and now they just seemed crazy. Their marriage was in shambles, broken. It wasn't supposed to be this way, it was supposed to be perfect, but somewhere along the way they hit a wall.

Kate paced around the living room as she waited for Jack to get home. She had been trying to prepare herself for this moment for a month now. She knew that this would be hard, but it was for the best. It wasn't fair for both of them to be stuck in an unhappy marriage. They both deserved to find people who would make them happy. Deep down she would always have a love for Jack, but sometimes love just wasn't enough. Soon enough this would all be over and they would both be free to live their lives. She hoped that he wouldn't fight it, she hoped he would let it go and move on. They had been stuck in this for a year now. Nothing seemed to work, marriage counseling, romantic getaways, nothing. Their marriage was broken, there was nothing left to salvage.

Around midnight Jack finally pulled into the drive. He noticed that the lights were still one, which could only mean one thing…she was waiting to talk to him. He knew that sooner or later he was going to have to face her. He hated fighting with her all the time. Turning off the car, he decided it was now or never, he had to get this over with. He had given careful consideration to what he was going to say to her. There was a new marriage counselor at the hospital that he was going to suggested to her. They had tried counseling a year ago when things started to fall apart, but they had never really given it a fair try. He wasn't willing to throw his marriage down the drain…not yet. They could make this work. It wasn't going to be easy, but he was willing to try for her.

"Hey," She greeted him, as he walked through the front door. "I've been waiting on you." She had been waiting up for hours, hoping that she would find the courage to do what needed to be done.

"Sorry, I had to check on some of my patients and then finish paperwork," He told her, making his way over to the couch.

"Jack, we need to talk," Kate told him as she followed him into the living room. She knelt down on her knees next to him so that she could be face to face with him.

"I know," he sighed. "I think we should try marriage counseling again. There is a new counselor at the hospital and I have heard that she is really good." He said to her as she looked away from him, keeping her eyes focused on the ground.

"I don't think that is going to work," She said, not moving her eyes from the ground. Slowly she found the strength to look at him again, noticing the confusion on his face.

"We will make it work, Kate," He said his voice sounding desperate, like a broken man who was dying on the inside. "I know that we have had our problems, and I know that I haven't been here lately, but I promise that I am going to fix this."

"I'm tired of this, Jack," She said trying to hold back the tears. He was making this harder than it needed to be. He always had a problem with letting go and moving on. "I can't do this anymore. I can't do _**us**_ anymore. It's not fair to either one of us to be stuck in this marriage. All we ever do is fight, and it's just not worth it anymore."

"Please, Kate," He pleaded with her, "I can fix this, I promise." He couldn't lose her, not after everything they had been through.

"We are broken, broken beyond repair, Jack," She told him, the tears began to fall down her face. "I've met someone else."

"What?" Jack asked her, surely she didn't just say those words. They were meant to be together forever, soul mates, best friends.

"I've been seeing someone for a month now," She informed him as she looked away from him. "He makes me happy, Jack. If you love me, then please just let me go."

"I need you, Kate," He cried, tears were falling fast down his face. "I love you. I will do whatever it takes, but please just don't give up on me."

"I will always love you, but I can't do this anymore. I can't just sit around and wait for you to fix this. I want a family, Jack. I want to have kids. I want a husband who loves me more than his job." She said as she gained the strength back in her voice. "We don't want the same things. Somewhere we just lost it and now there is no way to get it back. Please, Jack, please let me go. It's time to move on. You will find someone who will do the one thing I couldn't…make you happy."

"But you do make me happy!" He shouted at her, he had tried to keep it cool, but his temper was getting the best of him. "I love you! We can fix this, it's not going to be easy, but we can do it!"

"I love someone else, Jack. There is no way to change that." She told him, as she stood up and began to walk towards the door. "I'm leaving. He came over tonight and helped me pack my things. I'm so sorry, Jack."

"It's not over!" Jack shouted as he stood up from the couch and walk towards her. "You can't just leave. Where are you going to stay?"

"With him. I'm moving in with him." She whispered as she hung her head down and let the tears flow freely. "I hope you someone who makes you so happy, Jack. I will always love you. Goodbye." She turned towards the door and turned the knob. She couldn't even bring herself to look back at him. She wanted to stay with him, but she knew in her heart thing would never change. She couldn't hold on to the past, it was time to move on with her life.

Author's note: So, I decide to rewrite this story because I wanted to add more detail and make it better. Please let me know what you think, I would love to hear. Thanks for taking the time to read my story. The next chapter will be longer.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Hey guys, sorry that this chapter is so late. I have really busy over the summer with school and work, but all that is almost over! Thanks to everyone for the reviews! I know that Kate seems more like Sarah, but that is how I wanted her to act in this story. She is out of character and so is everyone else, but it was only for the purpose of this story. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy this chapter. Please let me know what you think. : )

…

"Hmm, can't you just call in sick today?" Sawyer asked, grabbing Kate's waist, pulling her back into their bed. If it was only thing that Sawyer really enjoyed, it was waking up next to Kate every morning. He wished that they could just stay in bed all day and forget the rest of the world, but he knew that sooner or later they would have to face reality.

"I wish I could, but I have a lot of stuff at work that I have to get done," she told him, giving him a small peck on the lips before pulling herself out of his embrace. It took all the strength she had in her to drag herself away from him and get out of bed.

"I can't wait until our honeymoon, when I can finally have you all to myself." He said, pulling the covers off of him, he slowly made his way out of bed. He watched as Kate made her way over to their closet, sorting through clothes trying to decide what outfit she was going to wear.

"That may be awhile," Kate sighed, pulling out a black pencil skirt and a white blouse. She knew that Sawyer wanted to marry her as soon as possible, but unfortunately her past made that impossible at the moment.

"Jack still hasn't signed the papers?" Sawyer asked, knowing that he hadn't, but still hoping that he had. The frustration was evident on her face as she collected the black heels to complete the outfit. He knew that the divorce had been hard on her, especially since Jack was refusing to let her go.

"No, he refuses to sign because he thinks that we still have a chance," Kate answered, as she laid her clothes out on their bed.

"Hey babe, I didn't mean to upset you," Sawyer apologized, wrapping his arms around her tiny waist. "I can go over and talk to him, if you want." He knew that it would probably one make things worse, but he would do anything to help her. Jack wouldn't listen to Kate, but perhaps he would listen to a stranger, (which is exactly what Sawyer was to him). They had only met each other once and it was just for a second, when Kate had gone back to the house to collect the rest of her belongings. They hadn't even spoken to each other, so maybe he would listen to Sawyer, or maybe it was just wishful thinking.

"No, I don't think that will help anything," she told him, burying her head in his bare chest. Kate knew that if she was ever going to get Jack to sign the divorce papers, she was going to have to talk to him alone. "I think I am going to try to talk to him after work."

"Do you really think that that is the best idea?" He questioned, not convinced that she should talk to Jack alone. He knew that Jack had a history of alcohol in his family, or at least that is what Kate had told him. She said that Jack was never abusive, but he wasn't the most pleasant person when he was drinking and he normally did it when he was stressed or upset about something. Getting a divorce was certainly enough to cause someone to drink and having your future ex-wife show up wanting you to sign divorce papers was not going to make it any better.

"I don't know, but I've got to give it a try," she told him, praying that she would be able to talk him into, praying that he would just let her go. She let out a small sigh as she pulled herself out of his embrace and made her way over to the bathroom door.

"I understand, but promise me that you will call me if you need back up," he said, following her into the bathroom. "I'm just worried that he will try to hurt you or something." He confessed, as she gave him one more kiss before turning on the shower.

"Jack would never hurt me," Kate told him, trying to stick up for him, but knowing that his family did have a history of abuse, especially when they were drunk. "I promise to call if anything happens, but I will be just fine."

She knew that Sawyer was just looking out for her, but it bothered her that he would assume that Jack would try to hurt her. She had known Jack since she was sixteen and he had never tried to hurt her. He had, however, yelled at her when he got drunk, but that was rare. It had only been a few times, but he had never physically abused her. He would sometimes say mean and hurtful things, but once he had sobered up he would always apologize and do whatever he could to make it up to her.

Sawyer was the complete opposite of Jack. He didn't drink, he cared more about his family than he did his work, and he was home more often. They had been together for about a year now and they seemed more like a family than Jack and Kate had ever seemed. Sawyer had already proposed to her, he had done it while they were out celebrating their six month anniversary. He had said that he just knew that she was the one he wanted to spend forever with and she had accepted, although she was a little reluctant at first. In her heart she wanted to believe that he was the one for her that she would be completely happy with him, but she knew that a part of her would always belong to Jack. She accepted only after realizing that Jack was never going to change and that she had to move on and stop living in the past.

Lately, their relationship had taken a new turn; Sawyer seemed to only want to talk about kids. Anytime they would go out and see kids, Sawyer would start talking about having kids of their own. He said that he wanted three kids, two boys and a little girl. He wanted to start their family right away, but Kate was a little hesitant to start planning their future before her divorce was finalized. A divorce and a wedding was not the situation she wanted to complicate with a baby.

After about an hour of getting ready for work, Kate was finally finished. As she made her way down the stairs, she could smell the bacon and eggs that Sawyer had prepared for them. He was always doing things like that for her, making breakfast, cleaning the house doing laundry. On paper he was the perfect boyfriend, but in her mind he would never be as good as Jack.

"You didn't have to make breakfast for me," She told him, pouring herself a cup of coffee and making her way over to the kitchen table.

"I know, but I wanted to," he responded, setting a plate of eggs, bacon and toast in front of her. "I was actually thinking of making dinner for you tonight, too." He said, giving her a suggestive wink. "Then maybe after that we could start working on that baby we have talking about. I think you would look so cute with a baby bump at our wedding."

"Hmm, as nice as that all sounds, I think we should wait until Jack actually signs the papers and the divorce is well on its way," she replied, taking a sip of her coffee.

"Well, he's going to tonight and it will be finalized within three months. So…if we start now you could be at least four months along when we get married," he told her, taking the seat next to her. "Although I would like you to be six months because the bigger the belly, the cuter you'll be."

"Ha ha, okay, okay you win," she told him, trying to hold back the laughter as she gave into his requests. "We can start tonight, as soon as I get home."

"I knew you would see it my way," he said, grinning from ear to ear."You know you could always call in sick and we could start right now."

"The offer is tempting, but I have to go deal with the whole Jack thing." She replied, standing up from her spot at the table.

"You are always so responsible," he said, taking a bite of the bacon that was on his plate.

"Someone in this house has to be," she giggled, leaning over to give him a goodbye peck on his cheek. "Have a good day."

"You too," he said, stealing a quick kiss on her lips. "Good luck with Jack and call me if you need backup."

"I don't think I will need it, but if I do, you will be the first one I call," she reassured him, as she made her way towards the front door.

…

It had been an extremely long day at work and Kate was not looking forward to seeing Jack. She knew she should have asked Sawyer to come along, but the last thing she wanted to have to deal with was a fight, which is exactly what it would have caused. She needed to do this alone; she just hoped that Jack would finally let her go. Her whole body tensed as she made her way through the hospital doors. As much as she hated bothering him at work, she knew it was the only place she would be able to find him.

"Umm, excuse me, miss," Kate said to the receptionist who was working the lobby. "Could you please page Dr. Shephard for me?"

"May I ask who you are?" The young woman asked, looking up towards Kate.

"I'm his wife," Kate said awkwardly. It was the truth, but it was still very awkward for Kate to say since she hadn't been with him for a year.

"If you are his wife, then how is it that you don't know that he took the day off today?" The lady asked, eyeing Kate with suspicion.

"I don't exactly live with him anymore," Kate told the lady in the nicest voice she could muster at that moment.

"Oh, I am so sorry," The woman apologized once she figured out what was going on.

"It's okay," Kate told her as she watched the woman's face turn red with embarrassment. "Are you sure that he took the day off?"

"Oh, yes," the woman replied with a nod. "He has been taking days off at least once a week."

"Umm, thank you," Kate said, as she excused herself from the front desk and made her way back towards the front entrance.

It wasn't like Jack to take time off from work. He had to be sick or hurt or something else was going on. Kate couldn't seem to wrap her mind around the fact that Jack had taken a day off from work and this was not the first time. Her mind continued to race as she started her car and pulled out of the parking lot. She knew exactly where her next stop was going to be and it was not going to be a fun one.

As she made her way up the steps towards his apartment, she wondered what kind of shape she was going to find him in. Would he be sick? Drunk? Or perfectly fine? Would she find him in bed with another woman? She wasn't sure why it mattered so much to her, they were getting a divorce, so he was free to see other people whenever he wanted. She hesitated briefly before knocking on the blue door with the numbers 815 on it.

"I already told you, I don't want any," a slurred voice shouted through the door. Kate could tell that he had been drinking and by the sound of it, a lot.

"Jack, it's me," Kate said through the door. "It's me Kate. Listen, I need to talk to you."

"Www…what iss it?" he asked stumbling over his words as he opened the door.

Kate stood in shock at the scene in front of her. He stood right in front of her, a thin, bearded man. He looked nothing like the man she had fallen in love with years ago. He seemed cold and broken, almost hopeless.

"Can I come in for a second?" Kate asked, trying to find the right words through her shock.

"Sure," Jack answered, stepping aside to let her into the apartment.

His apartment looked like a tornado had hit it. There were beer cans and empty take out boxes everywhere. Kate noticed that most of the liquor bottles were empty and the rest were almost empty. Empty pill bottles were lying around and there had to be at least ten of them. He was taking pain pills and drinking at the same time, which was never a good sign for anyone.

"Jack, what are you trying to do to yourself?" Kate asked on the brink of tears. She knew that the break up had been hard on him, but she had no idea how bad it really was.

"Why do you care?" He snapped, picking up a newly opened beer can and bringing to his lips. "Shouldn't you be with what's his name?"

"That is actually why I came," she said, ripping the can away from his hand. "I need you to sign the divorce papers. Please, Jack, please let me go." She pleaded, trying to look him the eye, but he refused to look at her.

"I will never let go of you, Kate!" he shouted as he grabbed her by the arm. "You're mine, you're my wife, and I will never give up on that."

"I'm not yours, Jack," she whispered, trying to pulling away from his grasp, "not anymore."

"You are mine, Kate!" He shouted once again. "Till death do us part, remember?"

"Jack, some promises are meant to be broken," Kate said, tears rolling down her face. She had so many different emotions that she was feeling at that moment, fear, anger, confusion, and most of all worry. She was worried about him. In all the years that she had known him he had never acted this way before. He had had his moments where he would yell at her, but he had never laid a finger on her until now.

"I'm getting married to Sawyer soon, and we are already trying for a baby. Face it, Jack, it's over between us." She told him as he slowly let go of her arms.

"I'm not signing the papers," he told her, opening the front door as he motioned for her to leave.

"Fine," she said her voice now full of anger. "My lawyer will be contacting you. One way or the other, we are getting a divorce. He didn't even respond to her, he just slammed the door in her face once her was sure she was safely outside.

It took Kate a long time to get home. She had to pull over two times to get her crying under control and once to fix her makeup. Sawyer had called her twice and left messages, worried about whether or not she was okay. She knew she couldn't talk to him while she was crying; she couldn't let him know that she was upset. By the time she had finally arrived home she had managed to stop crying and cover up the red around her eyes.

"Hey babe, I was getting worried about you," Sawyer said, as Kate made her way into the house. "Is everything okay?"

Before Kate had time to think about what she was doing, her lips had found his in a forceful kiss. It wasn't sweet or full of passion, it was a kiss full of desperation. She wasn't sure what she was doing anymore. All she wanted was to forget Jack, forget that a part of her still loved him and always would.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Sawyer said breaking the kiss. "What is going on, Kate?"

"You want a baby, so let's do it, right here, right now," she responded, shoving him up against the wall, her lips meeting his once more.

"Kate, hang on," he said gently pushing her away. "What happened with Jack?"

"He signed…I'm free…now shut up and let's make this baby," She told him between kisses.

"You got it," he said, pulling her up the stairs toward the bedroom. "You have just made me the happiest man in the world."

Author's note: I hope that you guys like this chapter. I worked really hard on it, so please review and let me know what you think. Should I make them have a skate baby? A miscarriage? Or no baby at all? I have an idea of what I want to do, but I would still love to know what you guys think.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Author's Note: Sorry that it has been so long since I last updated. Things have been super crazy and I just haven't had the time to write and when I have had some free time, I just haven't felt like writing. Anyway, here is a new chapter. Thank you guys so much for the reviews. Almost everyone said no to the Skate baby, but I'm still not sure what my final decision will be. I know what I want to do and I think that I will be able to write it in such a way that everyone will hopefully be satisfied. Thanks again for the support!

For the past few weeks, Kate had felt sick. She wasn't sure if it was the guilt of lying to Sawyer, the regret of leaving Jack, the confusion over her life and who she was in love with, or the possibility that she could be pregnant.

She figured that it must be guilt of what she had done to Sawyer. She had lied to him and then used him to take away her pain. She had not only used him, but she had used his want for a child to get what she wanted. She had made him believe that she wanted his child just as much as he wanted it, but she wasn't completely sure that was what she wanted anymore.

The worst part was that it wasn't just a onetime thing; she continued to do it over and over again every night. For the past few weeks she would come home, have a romantic dinner, and run upstairs and make love to him. At this point she was just going through the motions, using it as her drug to numb the pain she felt inside. She knew that it was wrong, but it was too late to turn back now.

"Hey, are you okay?" Sawyer asked, snapping her out of her thoughts.

"Yeah, it has just been a really long day," She replied trying her best to convince him that she was fine, even though it was a lie.

"I know just how to fix it," He told her, grabbing her hand, pulling her up from the chair she had been sitting in. "You, me, some candles, a bed," He said kissing her neck.

"Hmm, sounds good," She said, playing along. She wanted to be completely into it, but she knew that once again it would be a mistake.

"Great, let's go." He said picking her up, carrying her up the stairs to the bedroom.

(Skipping ahead because I don't really write detailed stuff like that. I'm sure you know what happens next.)

She wanted to cry, but she knew that if she did it would wake up Sawyer. She decided it was best to continue to lay her head on his chest and pretend like everything was going to be okay. Maybe she could dream about her life that she should have had with Jack and everything would be okay. Everything had to be okay.

Sawyer woke up to the sounds of vomiting coming from the bathroom. Part of him felt excited because he knew what it could mean, but he also felt bad for Kate because he knew that being sick was no fun. He made his way out of bed and walked over towards the bathroom door.

"Kate, sweetheart, are you okay?" He asked gently opening the bathroom door to reveal a pale looking Kate sitting on the floor next to the toilet.

"Yes, I think that I just have a bug or something," She said trying not to make a big deal out of it. She knew what he would think and the thought scared her. She wanted kids, but she didn't want any now, not when she was so confused about everything in her life.

"I think it might be the or something," He said jokingly, a big smile spread across his face. "Think about it Kate, we have been trying for four weeks now, every single night. I think our wish has come true!"

"Sawyer, it is just a bug. I would know if I were pregnant, okay?" She snapped, as she struggled to stand up. "Let's just go back to bed and we can talk about this in the morning."

"I guess the mood swings have already started," Sawyer said as they made their way back into the bedroom. He thought that it was just a joke and that Kate was just moody, but he suddenly realized that she was crying.

"Hey, baby, what is wrong?" He asked, pulling her into his chest. He hated seeing her cry, especially when it was because of something that he said.

"I just don't know if I will be a good mother," She lied. "What if I can't do it?" she continued to sob into his chest.

"You will be the best mother in the whole world," He told her, stroking her hair, trying desperately to calm her down.

"I'm sorry, I just got scared and I just need to calm down because I am not even pregnant," She said laughing slightly, wiping away the rest of her tears. "This is so silly, I am crying over the flu."

"I don't think that it is the flu, but I guess we will find out tomorrow." Sawyer told her, grinning from ear to ear.

"What are you talking about?" She asked him.

"Tomorrow we are going to take a test and find out if we've got a bun in the oven or not." He told her, the smile on his face growing bigger and bigger.

"I don't think that it is a good idea," Kate argued. "I'm not doing it."

"Yes, you are," He argued back. "We need to know so we can schedule your first doctor's appointment.

"Fine, let's just go back to bed and we will deal with this in the morning." She snapped once again, settling down into the bed.

An hour later, Kate was still up and she was still feeling completely sick. She knew that Sawyer was right, she was pregnant, it was the only explanation for the fact that she had been throwing up in the middle of the night for the past two weeks. She was late and that never happened and she was also very sensitive to smells that had never bothered her before. Now there was only one thing left for her to do…take a test. She couldn't wait until morning, she needed to know now and she needed to do it alone.

Very carefully, she made her way out of bed and got dressed without waking Sawyer. She didn't need him in her face about it because she needed to be able to cry and feel sad about this and he would be expecting a happy reaction, after all they had been trying to make a baby for the past month. Once she had finished getting dressed she made her way down the stairs and grabbed her coat and keys off of the wall and made her way out the door.

After driving around Los Angeles for an hour, she finally found a gas station that was open. Luckily it was in a good part of town, so she didn't have to worry about anything bad happening to her. She made her way into the store and rushed down the aisles until she found exactly what she was looking for. Grabbing the most reliable looking one she made her way over to the counter bumping into someone in the process.

"I am so sorry," She said to the person, reaching down to get the test that she had dropped.

"Kate?" The voice said as the body bent down to help her pick up the item from the floor.

"Jack?" She said, as she lifted her head to see him, his eyes staring at the small box in her hand.

She wished that she could disappear at that moment, maybe run away and never return, or just be completely erased from existence.

"Umm, Congratulations….I guess," He said pointing at the box.

"I, uh, I don't know if I, uh, I'm not sure," She continued to ramble, not knowing what to say.

"Do you need someone to talk to?" He asked her, sensing her anxiety about the situation. "I know that I am the last person that you would want to talk to about this, but I am here if you need me."

"Will you stand outside of the door while I take this?" She asked, trying to hold back the tears.

"Of course, let's just pay for it and then we can deal with whatever happens next." He gave her a reassuring smile as he helped her off the floor and over to the counter.

"I will be right out here if you need me." Jack told her, as she began to make her way into the gas station restroom.

"Thanks," She said, trying her best to smile.

She made her way into the restroom followed the step-by-step directions on the box. Once she had finished waiting for five minutes before she picked up the small stick to reveal the answer she had been waiting for. Turning it over, a fresh supply of tears ran down her face a she read what the tiny stick said.

Author's note: Sorry to leave it there, but I wanted to have a big cliff hanger. Please review and tell me what you think. Is she pregnant or not? I hope you guys stick with the story no matter what because I really think that I have a good idea and hopefully I will be able to write it out the way I have it in my head. Anyway, thank you for the reviews and the support. I will update faster if I get some reviews, so please tell me what you think. Thanks!


	4. Chapter 4

Hey guys,

I'm not sure that I am going to continue my stories. I have had major writer's block lately and I haven't been getting a lot of reviews, so I think that I am either going to take a break for awhile or just stop completely. Please tell me if you think that I should continue because I am just not sure that you guys are reading or enjoying any of my stories. If I get enough people interested then I will finish my stories, but if not I am going to take a break or just stop. Please let me know if you guys want me to continue. I would like to thank everyone who has every reviewed or read my stories, you guys are awesome. I hope to hear from you guys soon!

LostFan4Life


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